[CrackMonkey] Fwd: Re: [Pigdog] Beaujolais nouveau!

Sean Neakums sneakums at zork.net
Sun Dec 23 17:57:53 PST 2001

Just in case you weren't aware of the many fine things France has done
for the world, here is Mr. Bad to remind you.

-------------------- Start of forwarded message --------------------
To: pigdog-l at bearfountain.com
Subject: Re: [Pigdog] Beaujolais nouveau!
From: "Mr. Bad" <mr.bad at pigdog.org>
Date: 23 Dec 2001 17:54:37 -0800

>>>>> "EL" == Eugene Leitl <Eugene.Leitl at lrz.uni-muenchen.de> writes:

    EL> Ze frogs sure make horrible cars, but their wine is excellent.

This is untrue. The French make very fine cars. I think you're just
saying this because you are a useless European who uses public
transportation all the time and wouldn't know a good car if it kicked
him in the nuts. 

The French make good everything, actually. They had a great
revolution, for example, and a number of fine small rebellions. They
have a good, solid, and relatively consistent system of
measurements. They had a great calendar for a few years. Their round
flat little black hats make a sporty addition to any outfit and keep
your head plenty warm. They have fine philosophers -- towering
incomprehensible behemoths with bald heads and their own TV shows.

Just because the French didn't make German panzer shithead cars,
doesn't mean the cars are not great. I challenge you to find a single
decent human being who has ever driven a German car. German cars are
designed for the asshole market, and if you're not an asshole already,
they warp your mind to make you bad and wrong in the head. This has
been documented by the Radio Telescope in Areceibo.

In summary: you suck, French cars rock, and you suck.

~Mr. Bad

P.S. It's important to point out that talking about wine too much
makes your testicles shrink and dry like flaps of fruit leather.

 Mr. Bad <mr.bad at pigdog.org> | Pigdog Journal | http://pigdog.org/ 
  "...it occurred to me: the suckers have authority." -- Chuck D

-------------------- End of forwarded message --------------------

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